Not only did we enjoy each other’s company immensely, I found myself always wanting to do more with him—to share more good times together, to introduce him to more places from my past, and to encounter new adventures together in our future. With my now husband, the idea of getting married to him changed the whole picture of my life. I knew it would have challenges as well as adventures, but I was hopeful to go on the journey . At the time, I felt like I was playing a role more than being myself.The biggest difference between engagement one and engagement two was that my now husband made me hopeful about my future. I wasn’t settling; I wasn’t feeling guilted into making good on years of investment. When it came time to plan the wedding, I was hoping to marry him in six months, and I was disappointed when it took longer. I think he liked an image he had of me more than the real me, and consequently didn’t care to get to know me more for who I really was. We had deeper issues that we were ignoring by continuing our relationship.
Mr Tsai added that he wanted to fulfil Ms Chen's wish and decided to hold an engagement party at her funeral. In fact, if I used three words to best describe that engagement, they would be: Not only did I not know for sure if he was the man I wanted to marry, I was pretty much ready to breakup before he popped the question—and not because I was waiting for a proposal. Right, people often say, “When you know, .” This phrase incites knowing smiles in wives in equal proportion to how often it incites cringes among single people. I felt a lot of uncertainty in engagement number one.We knew we had different values, which we naively thought we could work it out, but in reality we could just never quite make it happen.I found myself continually submitting to his way or preferences over mine.